June Bugs ONE - Raven ZERO

The damn June Bugs Won! 

Tonight I was enjoying some peace and relaxation out on the patio, while surfing the web and enjoying some Stevie Nicks tunes when I was accosted by June bugs!

I hate June bugs.  They are some seriously over weight, needy bugs that cling to you and NEVER let go, even when you do a weird African type boogie woogie salsa dance!  They're like Velcro! 

They make weird noises as they fly around and I think they might be sight impaired as they never seem to know where they are going.  Either that, or they are drunk!  They slam into walls, chairs, lights and my head!  If they land on the ground, they do this weird type of break dancing and never seem to be able to get up on the first try.  I always watch them and think of that phrase:  Help me I've fallen and I can't get up....

They travel in a pack, as there won't be any... and then all of a sudden one comes, and then four, then twelve... then Forty!... I think they come from Mexico!!!  And you always know when they are coming cause you hear a pop sound, and everyone looks toward the sound, and you know...

It's a June bug!  

Then you start getting all paranoid, cause you know more will show up and take over your area.... knowing they are going to head for the light, but because they all show up intoxicated, they end up in your drinks, and in your hair or hanging on to your shirt while you freak out!  Finally you slap them off you causing them to fly away just to land on you again in a minute. 

It's a vicious cycle that you just can't win. 

Not Wanting Much....

Oh man!  I am outside, eating pasta and writing!  I love being outside!  I think I should live in a tent in the woods by a stream....  Okay maybe not a tent... but all the other stuff would work if it was a quaint cottage and had A/C, a room full of books.. and all the music I wanted.  I think I just described heaven...

I might need a kitchen and a bathroom.  And a porch bed swing... and obviously some mosquito repellent.  I hate those pesky things!  But JUNE bugs can freak me out and make me go in really quick!

I might could use a jeep... so I could get to the store... or a Olive Garden. I mean I guess I could just fish in the stream but who would clean them?  Not me!  I barely touch the bait for the hook.  Unless I use Hominy... then it's okay, but I won't touch a fish once I catch it.  NOPE!  A garden to work in would be cool.... LOTS OF CANTALOUPE PLEASE!

Yep... I don't need much....

My husband is a kiss ass

Eating at the Outback (Which was FULL)

Dennis:  I never have had to wait this long before.

Me:  They're busy....  It's not a big deal.

Dennis:  Yeah I know, cause I am with the girl I love. 

Me:  GAG!

I am married to a Little Debbie Junkie

Watching Dennis pull his hand out of a Little Debbie Swirl Box.....


Me:  OMGOSH Dennis!  Do you have enough?

Dennis:  What?!  This is all that would fit in my hand!

Me:  Are you going to eat all of those?

Dennis: For now... Doesn't mean I ain't coming back for more though!

Ahhh Family time!

I can FEEL the food chain shifting.....
 

This is how my mom survived raising 4 children.  She ignored us!  Pretending we were never up to no good.