Swimsuit suicide watch! I can't believe I pay for this torture!

This mess spells depression!  The Sales lady will love me!

So... I bit the bullet today and finally went swim suit shopping! Only took me 5 years!  And let me just say, that was the most depressing 3 hours of my life! My friend Tracy went with me and I swear she brought me every swimsuit they had... every color.... every style... and none of them made me look even near 18 again. or 21, or 34, or 46... or.... well you get the point! UGH!

What happened to the fun time of buying that perfect suit with your friends, the one that hugged you in the right places and showed off what little you had.  And the fact that you wanted the boys to see you in it.  Laying out with your friends at a public pool or a lake!  NOW, I am looking for a swimsuit that not only sucks in, lifts up, divides, conquers, trims, molds, squashes, separates, reshapes and defines, but also one that will look good completely covered up with a large Sarong wrapped around my entire body!   And we PAY for this?!?!

If I wasn't going to the Atlantic Ocean in a couple of weeks... I would not have bought one!

Life is unfair and who needs it!!!  Why must women trade in their perfect little OP bodies when they have kids?!?!  Oh who am I kidding... I got this figure from my love of chocolate ice cream!  Well... here's to Special K for breakfast, lunch and dinner the next couple of weeks!!!

SUNBURNED!!!!! Holy Hell

I am on this mission to tan.  Why?  Cause I am going to Florida and the beach. I want to wear nice cool flowing sun dresses and sandals and be comfortable... I don't want to be the pasty white girl on the beach looking pathetic, so I thought I would get my tan on.

 

I got my burn on! 

It hurts. 

Holy Hell!

 

When I told Dennis that I didn't' want to look stupid at the beach all white, he said,  "Yeah, now you get to go all peeling and gross!  That's the look to go for!" Smart ass husband.... 

 

I forgot how a sunburn hurts!  I am a dumb ass! 

I am a Librocubicularist!

Okay so I am a librocubisularist.  There!  I admit it.  I enjoy that time of day.  And I also wear my hair up and have glasses.  I prop up on numerous pillows and even sometimes have a robe up all the way to my neck, with a hot cup of something ready at all times.  But I am not understanding the thigh highs.  Pretty sure I don't own a pair or would wear them while I read.  They are a little scary, and frankly.... it makes me uncomfortable just seeing this.  Plus I think this chick fell asleep as she has no pupils! 

More Space Needed!!

My kitchen table is never going to be the same.  I have it filled with crap!  I am so busy with computer stuff and book stuff and ledgers.... the list is long and all of that is on my table. I can't see the top!  It's sad.  I need a desk.  Wait!  I have a desk.  It wasn't big enough!  Now I need a bigger table.  Maybe I need to just simplify and do one thing at a time!  YEAH RIGHT!  I have not time for one thing at a time.  It all has to be done by last Tuesday!  I would take a picture... but my phone is on the table... and I can't find it.  :(

This is not a Drill!

The last two weeks are not the weeks to live in Oklahoma!  We have had so many tornado's, I can't even tell you, for sure, how many we have actually had. 

Is TOO DAMN MANY close enough?

But it isn't the same as hearing the weatherman say "There is a mile wide storm with a multiple vortex tornado coming straight for you!"

.... which it was. 

Both sides of neighbors come over with their dogs and our neighbors from across the street.  We all watch the weather while we still have time before we have to go in the fraidy hole.  Of course our electricity goes out! It goes out when the sky is blue, and the birds are singing, and there is no wind.
I think if someone in the neighborhood  farts.... the electricity goes out!

Anyway... the last thing we heard on the TV was; "We have a tornado on the ground ONE mile south of I40 heading toward Yukon.

DUDE!  We LIVE 1 mile south of I40!  So this tornado was not just heading toward our town... but our street.... Without power and us having the weatherman to depend on... We start going down into the cellar. 

We have a 15 man cellar and we had 11 people and 7 dogs in before the night was up.  

You learn things when you go in the basement for real.  You know.... when you actually have to close the door because a truck might slam into your face if you don't? 

I learned  IT IS HOT in there! We need CIRCULATION!!!

I learned we need benches instead of chairs.  Chairs are bad.  They are big and take up too much room!  

We need a weather radio cause the life gets SUCKED out of your phone while you have iheart radio streaming... listening to the weather!

I also will take a ice chest down there and put some water in it!

 I was not prepared this storm... except with a place to go and lights!  I had two lanterns and 4 push on lights.  WHY for one small area I have NO IDEA.. but we were good in the light department!!!

After the tornado threat was over... we needed an ark!  It rained 10 inches and flooded lots of places in the city and surrounding towns. 

I am ready for this storm season to be over with.