Video?

I might do some video blogging if I can figure it out on here.  I am not changing to another blogger.  I just learned this one.  But wouldn't it be cute to go back one day and watch videos to go with some blogs?  Okay maybe just for me... but then again... maybe not! :P

Cute as pie!

I got a new computer and decided to get all my password someone "gathered" and delete accounts and programs I am not using, like Google - whatever it's for.  But in the process, I thought I had deleted my blog!  Can you imagine?  It's like a diary to me... I almost needed CPR!  Now I see it's fine and I can still log on and post, so I will not be doing anymore deleting accounts to try to clean house.  On the upside, isn't 'my new background cute as pie!?!?!

Omg did I just delete my blog!!!!!!!

Christmas blues... My boy needs to move home

I miss my boy every day but holidays are harder,  I miss how he would sit by the tree for hours trying to figure what that ONE present was, asking me question after question.  When he was 15 I bought him his first guitar but didn't put it under the tree.  I knew if I wrapped it he would manhandle it like all the other presents that were his under the tree.  He spent HOURS driving me nuts trying to figure out not only where I hid it but what it is that I HAD to hide it.  He would ask:  "Is it bigger than a bread box?  Can I take it places?  Will it fit in a toaster!?  Can I put it in my pocket?"   I told him you can take it on the roof if you want!  He was stumped! But so excited to see what I got him,  He has always loved to get gifts and no matter what they were , he thanked you for them and appreciated them.   I  haven't got to see him open gifts for the last two years, nor do I get the build up before hand with the 20 question games!   I also miss how he hung around the kitchen for hours as I prepared the meal.  and telling him the olives and the eggs where for DINNER!  And believe it or not, I really miss him aggravating his siblings.  I hope this is the last Christmas I have to be away from him.

Now what?

How can something so insignifantly small be the last straw in a hay stack full of straws?  I don't hear a climax of music or feel a triumph of victory.  There isn't even a "ah huh!" Moment.  There is just realization that this is not my path.  And I want more.